I remember the days I used to care, so much for you, her, him, them, us.
Throwing my heart out for the sake of keeping yours safe. What a waste.
These days I can’t recall how it was like to feel, to grasp emotions like I should.
Where’s my heart at? Which dumpster should I dig and look for? Which trash?
Because when something is treated as such, with disgust, eventually it turns to mud.
You play the game well like a champion held up at a gunshot. Pride and fear checked in.
You make your moves with pride and the realization that I hold all your cards.
Only that I never say it and I keep hoping for the day you’ll apologize come around.
My kindness is taken for granted. Heart out of the window. Pride intact but damaged.
What more could one do?
When people step all over you and never find an end to it? Are they never satisfied?
Do they eventually forget to fear our building up rage? Our hell that’s escaping?
Do they grow out of shame and use us as their black goat to protect their self esteem?
Because what’s unfair will never be fair, no matter how pretty the icing on the cake is.
Nobody got the time to keep protecting you. Nobody got the time to keep babying you.
So wake up and see where your pon is at.
When someone holds you at checkmate, don’t try your luck.
We might be the nicest angels you’ve ever met but we got devils in our hearts.
And I’m not stopping mine when she decides to come out.