by Devina Gunawan
I know, I know. Using anything ‘Bradshaw’ related is a horrible idea. But in many cases, I have seen too many Preston-Bradshaw plot line in this lifetime going on for me to ignore. I mean, it is basically how a lot of love stories go. We question why, and how, and I am sure deep down we all know the reasons why.
A lot of women cannot handle the perfect men. And it’s true. A lot of us dream of finding the prince charming, but when we finally get to him, we do not want him anymore. When a man is exactly what we had dreamed of, he becomes exactly what he is supposed to be. The track goes spiraling down from “Oh wow I have found my prince charming,” to “Oh my he is boring.”
I have ranted more than enough of how much I hate Carrie for leaving Aidan. But the truth is, if I had an Aidan Shaw by my side, I would probably get bored and find entertainment elsewhere. Which, is what Carrie did.
We want what we cannot have. And this, I refer to Big/Preston’s lack of commitment. He cannot commit and he is a free agent. Carrie knows how horribly he treats her, but she still finds him alluring. Because she knows that she cannot have him the way she wants. That he will never say the three words she longs to hear and be fully hers.
He has made her feel like a lot of things but appreciated. Sure, they laugh together and do bad things together. Sure we can call that a great chemistry, but even Carrie knows that something always feels missing with Big. She doesn’t really know what, but it never stops her from going back to him.
So here is my analysis on those of us who go back to horrible relationships when there are clearly perfect princes out there.
We want what we cannot have. We love questioning and having uncertainties. It is exciting, it is fun, and it is like winning a lottery when we get what we hope for. There is a part of life in which we want to always be excited for, and we cannot have that and a prince charming at the same time.
The perfect man will bore some of us to death. He will be perfect in every way, very patient and caring, and you will start dozing off. Your friends will say, “You are so lucky to have found such a man,” but you won’t feel that way. There is no excitement, no fight, no adorable flaw that will drive you crazy. You will start seeing how the world’s image of ‘perfect man’ is the most flawed you’ve ever had. Because perfection is boring, and it’ll get to you.
Big told Carrie, that in the end he wanted to be with someone who made him laugh.
Okay. I think it means more than that. It takes a lot to find the one with the right sense of humor that matches you, right? It is just like finding someone who accepts you for who you are. Chances are, you two will fight a lot, clash a lot, and hate each other a lot. But it’s the beauty of love, that no matter how annoying one is, how crazy you go, you will find your way back to the ones you love.
Just like family, if you think about it.
Carrie will always find her ways back to Big. They have gone through so much that they are connected already. They have done horrible things together, felt remorse separately together, and laughed about what they had done together. And so far I have been hearing, “You will end up with your best friend. Someone who is more of a partner than a butterfly kind of love.”
And it’s how it is, I guess. Carrie and Big were always connected, no matter where they were. They had done things together and they knew exactly how to work harmoniously. They were partners.
And I hate to admit it. I have always hated the ending, and more than so, I have always hated the ending of Aidan Shaw.
But even I have to admit, that if I were Carrie, I would not have stayed with Aidan. I would look for crazy, untamed, wild love stories out there, instead of the safe, comfortable home that Aidan was.
And yes, I do settle for less than a prince charming. Because life for me is not a printed book with cliche romances. It is full of adventures, and I need to feel the adrenaline rush every now and then. Without it, there is no passion for me.
And given that, yes, I am fully aware that I am already doomed.